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Potty Training Reimagined: Your Guide to Success in 3 Days

Overwhelmed by potty training? Here’s how to navigate this milestone with success, all while building your child’s life-long confidence and body awareness.

Dr Becky Kennedy

Dr Becky Kennedy, Clinical Psychologist

8 min read

Potty Training Tips for Parents | Good Inside

Are you ready to ditch diapers, but feel overwhelmed about how to get started with potty training? Maybe you've been through the toilet training process before and dread the idea of going through that mess again with your younger kid? Is your child still having frequent accidents?

For so many families, potty training is one of those "how-will-I-ever-survive-this" parenting moments. And that has a lot to do with what we call it in the first place: “potty training.” The idea of "training" shifts our focus to shaping our child's behavior - leading parents to punish accidents, place kids on the toilet at scheduled intervals, and spiral when things aren’t going the way we expected.

Here’s the thing: The potty process isn't really about peeing and pooping on the potty. It's about your child feeling independent, in control, and aware of their own body. 

That's why we call our potty training program a "potty learning” program at Good Inside. Our approach to the potty process is unlike anything else you’ll find. You’ll not only learn how to tackle this milestone with success, you’ll also empower your kid with life skills like body sovereignty, confidence, and independence. Yes, all of this is possible with the Good Inside potty program… we can’t wait to show you how!

When’s the right time to start potty learning?

There's no universal "right" age to start potty learning - every child develops at their own pace. So, how do you know when your child is ready to ditch diapers? 

First, let’s bust some of the myths around potty training for toddlers. These are NOT signs of readiness:

  • Your child’s friends are being potty trained
  • A relative or friend says your child is ready for potty training
  • Your own anxiety or fears about potty training
  • The age you were when you were potty trained
  • The age your other kids were when they were potty trained

Instead, look to your individual kid for these signs of readiness:

  • Ability to follow simple instructions
  • Tendency to stay dry for at least two hours
  • Tendency to be dry after naps
  • Regular and predictable bowel movements
  • Curiosity about bathroom activities
  • Discomfort with dirty diapers
  • Ability to understand bathroom words and relevant body part words
  • Desire for more independence (this might show up as resisting help or trying to do things on their own)
  • Communication of wants and needs (verbal or non-verbal)

The key idea: Don't rush it! Potty learning is one of the first times your toddler is learning whether they are in charge of their own body. The process of understanding the feelings and sensations in their body is the same foundational process that builds confidence, informs healthy boundaries, and shapes so many other important skills later in life.

How to set yourself up for potty learning success

Before starting the process, reflect on your own feelings about potty learning. By anticipating feelings that might come up for you while toilet training, you’ll be better prepared to cope with them - so you can show up as a sturdier parent for your child. Ask yourself:

  • What happens when I’m invested in something that feels out of my control?
  • How do I react to making mistakes and tolerating frustration?
  • What happens when my house gets dirty or messy?
  • How comfortable am I allowing my kids to separate from me?

It’s also critical to separate the outcome from the process:

  • The outcome is your child using the potty. 
  • The process is your child noticing signs in their body, having accidents, feeling independent, and building confidence in themselves.

Prioritizing the process is what leads to successful outcomes now and later, especially when your child is out of the house without any prompts or desire to please you.

How to set your child up for potty learning success

Building up a child’s body awareness, comfort with the potty, and understanding of the process in advance ensures that potty learning will go much smoother. In the months before officially starting to use the potty, try these low-effort, high-impact strategies.

Build associations with the bathroom

Start changing your child’s dirty diapers in a bathroom (ideally with them standing up so they feel more independent!) and dump your child’s poop from the diaper into the toilet. This helps your child connect peeing and pooping to being in a bathroom.

Model connecting “that feeling” to using the potty

You want to teach a child that there is a feeling that is a bodily cue to pee or poop. Share aloud: “Oh, I have that feeling… Yup, my bladder is telling me it’s full! I’m going to the bathroom, and then I’ll be right back.”

Empower your child

Let your child pick out undies, so they feel like an active participant in the process. You can also introduce the potty without pressure, placing it in the bathroom and letting them explore it.

3 easy potty techniques

We recommend setting aside three days for the beginning of the potty learning process. (Yes, with the right approach, your child can learn to use the potty in just three days!) Try to stay at home during these days, so your child can focus on building their new potty skills. A long weekend is a great time to start. 

Here are some easy potty training techniques to lean on during this time:

1. Prepare your home

Put several potties around the house for easy access. Stock up on your kid’s favorite drinks or make popsicles, so they’re consuming extra liquid. 

Remember: Accidents are a normal part of the potty learning process! To reduce your own stress, roll up rugs, cover furniture with old blankets, and keep cleaner and paper towels in common areas. You might also want to keep a stack of extra underwear or a change of clothes nearby.

2. Explain what’s different

When your toddler wakes up on day one, explain what’s about to happen: "It’s an exciting day! We’re going to start using the potty. I know you can figure this out! We’re going to take off your diaper. What undies do you want to wear?"

3. Focus on bodily autonomy

During this exciting milestone of potty learning, emphasize the importance of bodily autonomy. Share, "Your job is to pay attention to your body and let me know when you have that ‘I have to go!’ feeling. We will run to find a potty when you have it and get as much of the pee or poop in there as you can!"

3 key takeaways on potty learning

Okay, we covered a lot of information about reimagining potty training. New ideas can feel exciting… and they can also feel overwhelming! Let’s ground ourselves in three key takeaways:

  • The potty process isn't actually about peeing and pooping on the potty. It's about your child feeling independent, in control, and aware of their own body. 
  • Every kid is different. You’ll know when it’s the “right” time for your child to start the potty process. 
  • Empower your child in the potty process by letting them pick out undies, get used to the toilet, and tell you when they have “that feeling.”

Most importantly, remember this: You just took time out of your (very!) busy schedule to reflect on how to navigate this milestone with your child. That’s amazing, and your kid is so lucky to have you.


Need more support? Good Inside can help

There’s so much more to cover when it comes to the potty process. How do you respond if your child refuses to use the potty? Or when they have accidents? What if your child has poop anxiety? 

You deserve support through every “But what about when…?” moment. And that’s exactly why we created Good Inside. Explore our all-in-one Potty Learning Program to get everything you need for a stress-free and successful potty process. And the best part? It’s completely FREE! 

Our mission is to help parents like you through every age and stage of your child’s life. After you find potty success, Good Inside Membership is here for all of the rest, too.

FAQs about potty learning

What are some effective potty training tips for parents of toddlers?

The potty learning process will go much smoother if you start by building up your child’s body awareness, comfort with the bathroom, and understanding of the process itself. This might look like placing a potty in the bathroom and allowing your child to explore it, empowering your kid to pick out their own underwear, and talking to your kid about “that feeling” of needing to go pee or poop. These tips will give you a solid foundation before you officially transition your child out of diapers. For more step-by-step potty tips, check out Good Inside’s FREE Potty Learning program.

At what age should potty training typically start for boys?

There's no universal "right" age to start potty learning - every child develops at their own pace. However, there are certain signs of readiness you may notice with your kid! Look for cues such as showing curiosity about bathroom activities, keeping a dry diaper for longer periods of time, or desiring more independence (your kid might resist help or try to do things on their own). For more step-by-step potty tips, check out Good Inside’s FREE Potty Learning program.

What are the signs that your child may not be ready for potty training?

Your child may not be ready for potty learning if they have a lack of interest in the potty, struggle with simple instructions, and rarely have a dry diaper for longer than two hours. It's important to wait until your individual child shows signs of readiness to ensure a smoother transition to the potty! For more step-by-step potty tips, check out Good Inside’s FREE Potty Learning program.

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